Thursday, March 31, 2011

First Friday AW Review: Three Days to Dead by Kelly Meding

Ever worry about waking up dead some morning? It happened to Evy Stone, and she’s not pleased. She has 72 hours to figure out how she died, why she died, and who’s behind it. Good thing she has friends to rely on. Okay, acquaintances. And maybe a few dangerous strangers.

THREE DAYS TO DEAD by Kelly Meding is a pinball machine of a novel, knocking the reader upside the head and in a new direction with every plot twist. Action fills every corner as Evy fights supernatural forces inside and out, turning a city’s underworld of vampires, goblins, trolls and gargoyles on its flaming, slashed ear. The plot is so tight and tense that I finally let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding when Evy and her companion find a quiet haven to recuperate for a few hours. There’s literally no rest for the wicked or the innocent, however, and the final battle is so sharply written, I could see the fight scenes clearly in my mind.

This book is no light, fluffy fantasy read, but you’ll want to hang on while Kelly Meding slams you into every bell until your world tilts.

THREE DAYS TO DEAD is published by Dell Books and is available at Amazon. It’s the first in the Dreg City series. AS LIE THE DEAD (Book 2) is out in paperback, and ANOTHER KIND OF DEAD (Book 3) will be released this summer.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

The Practical Kitchen

Recently the "Real Simple" website offered up a slideshow about new uses for things in your kitchen. Most were very clever, but still required a certain competency level of the cook. I’ve created my own list to help the culinary-challenged, and mine is more practical because it includes zombie defense.

1. Use a wok as a chest protector when you’re naked and frying bacon. If you’re particularly busty, use two and a bungee cord.

2. Have a crème brulee torch? I don’t know what you’re doing here, but hey, I don’t judge. Torches are great in up-close zombie combat. Attach a couple of those long grill forks to the front for extra poking power.

3. Cookie cutters can be flattened and sharpened into shuriken. You never know when ninjas will attack.

4. When you’ve overfilled the cake pan and a monstrous devil’s food demon is about to explode into the kitchen, wedge a few wooden spoons under between the handle and the side of the oven. This gives you a few seconds to escape Death by Chocolate.

5. Use a pastry brush and some food coloring to gently paint away any evidence that you’ve burned dinner. Hey, who wants more purple pot roast?

6. Take aluminum foil and make it into a hat. This will keep the aliens from stealing your prize pineapple-pepperoni soup recipe. It also distracts anyone coming into the kitchen looking for snacks. Oooh, shiny.

7. A spatula and strips of dish towel make an excellent bow. Fray the ends of string cheese sticks for arrows. Use the bread you baked but no one was brave enough to eat as foundation for a fort. Order in some Chinese food and defend your dumplings against greedy family members.

What are your completely practical uses for kitchen stuff? Share in the comments!